Monday, June 1, 2015

It's worth it.

Mother's Day. I have witnessed many facebook well-wishes to mothers and beautiful memories and tributes all around the world....and it got me thinking.....

It's funny. Before you have your own kids, you don't really hear about all the craziness that comes after having, naturally it was just one big shock to my dream of motherhood when I slowly found all these things know, the not-so-fun side of being a mother. I know, I know, you are if she just said that! But, I know for a fact, that every.single.mother has had those moments of wanting to throw in the towel....if ever so brief....we have all had them. Whether it was in the midst of a 2 year old tantrum or out of sheer exhaustion at 3 am when the word 'sleep' has become extinct in your family dictionary, or when you just want to sit down and have your own space and time to just think (about nothing or everything!) but someone is wanting juice, help putting on those next to impossible polly pocket clothes, help cleaning up a spill etc and you just can't get that time alone unless you are in the bathroom (and even that is hard to do!),  or the time when your kids are dishevelled and unruly and then *that family* shows up that seems soooo perfect and makes you seem like a failure and you just want to be invisible......those are just some of those challenging moments, to name a few. But I find it's not even in the major moments where motherhood is the hardest, in fact I would argue that it is in the day-to-day life of a mom where some of the biggest mountains need to be traversed. I am talking about serious, only 6 more hours until daddy gets home, I can do this!! And inevitably we make it to the end of the day, and after the kids are tucked in bed, we flop down on whatever clean surface we can find and this what the rest of my life is going to be like? I am EXHAUSTED!!!

One of my biggest struggles has been finding purpose and value in my what I do. Sometimes it is so hard to see through the barrage of diapers, drool, mashed banana, laundry mountains, dishes, meals and the other 1000 things us mothers do in a day and see the importance of it all....sure, when I sit down and really think of it, I know this is an awesome, important, special, once-in-a-lifetime chance to raise the next generation....and my kids are my favorite, and I love them beyond words and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.....but how come I lose sight of all that in the day to day sometimes? Why does it have to be so hard? It is a daily, 'die-to-self' job, one that often times is only witnessed by you and God and hopefully one day our kids will 'rise up and called us blessed'....but, that is not why we do what we do.

We are mothers because we have been called to be.

These little lives (real humans!!!) have been given to us by God to mold, grow, love, encourage, train and walk alongside in this crazy thing called life....I mean, how AMAZING is that?! And there's something else. God knew that we needed to be molded, loved, encouraged, and trained during our adult years as well....and so He uses our kids to do that! It's one big refining fire! My kids reveal sin in my life on a daily basis which I think is the thing that is the most challenging to me as a mother. To face my weakness is not a fun time. I want to think that I have it all together....all by myself, and maybe let other people think that too. I have to remember that in our weakness, He is our strength......He can't help someone who is so full of pride that there is no room for His help. God uses my kids to teach me, to humble me, to shape me into the woman He wants me to be.....and I daily strive to leave behind selfishness, discontentment, complaining, impatience, anger, judging others, pride, hypocrisy, ingratitude and a whole slew of other un-Christ-like behaviors....all those reactions to the situations we find ourselves in on a daily basis while parenting (some days are a success and others are a complete disaster!....I am a work in progress!)

So, in the end, despite the challenging moments/ encouraged to know that there is eternal purpose in them.....for you and for your kids. Nothing comes easy....and that is's gonna hurt, and it's gonna be hard but in the end, we will be who He wants us to just hang in there as he shapes us through our kids! So, If you haven't had kids yet, don't let this scare you off....embrace it'll never be the same (in a good way) again!

These adorable faces bring the greatest joys and the most challenging moments!

Sweet Evie, a chance to mold another precious life

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